Have you ever found yourself holding a book or article, only to realize you don’t remember a single line of what you read just two minutes ago? Have you ever suddenly raised your voice at a colleague, even though just a moment earlier, you were happily discussing a client, with no sign of an impending conflict? Or perhaps you’ve struggled to relax and enjoy your Sunday online sports betting session because you suddenly started thinking about tomorrow’s meeting and the fact that the baseboards at home are still uncleaned?
What Is Mindfulness, and Why Is It Important?
Mindfulness is the ability to focus on present experiences and sensations without drifting into thoughts about the past or future and without labeling those sensations as good or bad. Why is it crucial to cultivate this skill?
The ability to stay fully present helps us recognize our habitual patterns of behavior and interaction. This, in turn, gives us a chance to break free from habits that no longer bring us joy or meaningful benefits. By practicing mindfulness, we become capable of stepping away from automatic thought and behavior patterns. It makes us less dependent on external validation and circumstances, allowing us to understand ourselves better — and, as a result, others as well.
Mindfulness is particularly valuable in moments of intense emotions. When we recognize and name our emotions, we gain the power to decide how to respond to them, rather than letting them dictate our actions.
Mindfulness is essential for following our interests and making the best possible decisions at any given moment in life.
Is Mindfulness Always Pleasant?
When we strive to live mindfully, we experience joy, inspiration, and other positive emotions more vividly and fully. In this state, we can let go of intrusive thoughts that prevent us from enjoying the moment.
For instance, many people struggle to embrace pleasure completely. The voice of a parent or grandparent echoes in their mind: “You have to pay for everything,” or “If you laugh now, you’ll cry later.” Similarly, when offered an exciting and well-paid job, some people instinctively think, “There’s no such thing as a free lunch — there must be a catch.” They might then either accept this thought, feel anxious, and ruin their own evening, or pause and recall that the company has excellent employee reviews, a solid reputation in the industry, and that they already discussed clear work boundaries during the interview. In this way, mindfulness helps us break free from limiting beliefs and self-fulfilling prophecies, stay grounded in reality, and embrace our right to happiness.
However, mindfulness enhances not only positive emotions but also neutral and negative ones. We might realize that we feel indifferent toward something we were conditioned to praise or condemn based on social expectations. Or we might notice a curiosity about a subject without attaching a positive or negative judgment to it.
On the journey to mindfulness, we will inevitably encounter emotions we typically label as negative. Who enjoys feeling fear, hatred, or disgust? Yet, we must acknowledge and accept these emotions as well. When something unpleasant happens, our instinct is to run from it. This avoidance brings temporary relief but ultimately limits our emotional depth, hinders personal growth, and increases our risk of encountering morally or physically unsafe situations. Negative emotions serve as crucial signals — warning us when our boundaries are violated or when our values are under threat.
Additionally, mindfulness requires us to take an honest look at ourselves and become more aware of our true emotions. If we have clung to an idealized self-image (“I’m not the type to envy, mock, or lie”), mindfulness can shatter that illusion. For some, this process is painful, but it also allows us to access hidden parts of our personality that contain significant energy. Rather than suppressing these aspects, mindfulness helps us harness them for personal development. For example, if we feel irritated by a colleague’s success, we can pause and ask ourselves: “I’m feeling envious — why? What qualities make them so productive? Can I learn something from them?”
How to Develop and Practice Mindfulness
There are many ways to cultivate mindfulness.
Yoga, Taoist practices, and various martial arts help us focus on the body and become more attuned to its signals. Additionally, physical training — especially when it involves interaction with others — prevents us from becoming too distracted. During a sparring session, it’s impossible to think about an unfinished dissertation; in a soccer match, daydreaming about tomorrow’s trip can cost you a missed goal.
There are also other approaches. Try a simple exercise: for a few minutes, try forming sentences that express what you’re aware of at that moment. Begin each sentence with “Here and now” or “At this moment.”
Throughout the day, you can periodically ask yourself: “What is happening in my body right now when I’m rushing to meet a deadline?” “How does my body react to joy when I see a loved one?” “Do I feel hungry or thirsty?” “Am I too cold? Too warm?” Some people even set phone reminders to practice mindfulness two or three times a day using this method.
Mindfulness meditation is another powerful tool. Start with short sessions — just one or two minutes is enough. Over time, you can extend the practice to 15-20 minutes or more. Sit comfortably, relax, and focus on your breath, bodily sensations, or the sounds around you. Don’t worry if your mind wanders; with practice, you’ll learn to gently bring it back to the meditation focus. You can meditate alone or join a group led by an experienced instructor who can guide you.
Do You Need to Be Mindful All the Time?
Mindfulness can become a beneficial habit, but it’s rare for anyone to maintain it throughout the entire day. And is that even necessary? After all, mindfulness is a tool, not an end goal — it helps us create a more fulfilling, balanced, and dynamic life by unlocking new sources of energy and resilience.
While striving for mindfulness is admirable, becoming obsessed with it can be counterproductive. If you start feeling anxious or guilty for not always being present, mindfulness may lose its benefits. Mindfulness isn’t a magical solution to all problems, and rigidly adhering to it can lead to a dysfunctional or even toxic mindset.
The Dark Side of Mindfulness
In recent years, mindfulness has been widely marketed as a product. However, you should acknowledge the potential downsides and unintended consequences of these practices.
Mindfulness alone won’t solve external problems. While it helps us understand ourselves and stay connected to our emotions, mindfulness isn’t a magic fix. If you invest more in a relationship than your partner does, mindfulness won’t make them reciprocate your efforts (since we can’t control other people). If you want a job, you still need to send applications and attend interviews. Being present in the moment is valuable, but real change requires action. If you’re practicing mindfulness regularly but seeing no real improvements in your life, it might be worth consulting a psychologist.
Misinterpreted mindfulness can damage relationships. Some people approach mindfulness in a self-centered way, focusing on their emotions while neglecting how their actions affect others. But mindful relationships require awareness of both our feelings and those of the people around us.
For example, if you decide you don’t feel like meeting a friend today, that’s your right. However, if they’re already waiting for you at the subway station, they have every right to be upset. The key is to respect both your own boundaries and the feelings of others. Mindfulness can worsen mental health in some cases. Not everyone benefits from mindfulness. If you’re struggling with past trauma or future anxieties, mindfulness might intensify distress. Some experts even warn that mindfulness meditation can be harmful for individuals with a history of psychosis, bipolar disorder, self-harm, or suicidal tendencies. If you’re unsure whether mindfulness is right for you, consult a specialist to ensure you’re practicing it at the right time and in a way that supports your well-being.
